Wastrel's Quotes

"Strictly Enforced!"
This article contains spoilers!
If you haven't finished the game, please proceed with caution.

Below is a listing of everything the Wastrels say in We Happy Few.

The Wastrels had 4 voice actors, while the Wastrellettes had 3. Most of the actors are unknown, with the exception of Wayne Cole and Jay Simon.

Idle[]

Men:[]

Am I my brother's keeper? Am I?
- References the story of Cain and Abel. After Cain murders Abel and God asks him where Abel is, Cain answers "I know not: am I my brother's keeper?"
At least I don't have to wear that idiotic mask anymore.
- None of the Wastrels have to wear the Happy Face Masks that the Wellies wear.
At least we could have made them take them. At least we could have not done it for them.
- References The Very Bad Thing, and how the citizens did things for the Germans without much force.
But if the war's over, why didn't they send them back?
- References the promise the Germans made, that the children will come back when the war is over.
Don't worry mate, it'll all be over soon.
Filthy bastards!
How'd I deserve this?
I wish I died in the bombings.
It's all some vicious joke, isn't it.
It's always darkest before the dawn. But how long is the night?
Of course you can have your cake and eat it too, where's the paradox?
- The popular English figure of speech, "You can't have your cake and eat it (too)" essentially means one can't have it both ways.
Remember bread? I remember bread. I remember too much, now.
So tired. So very tired.
Stop the movie. Oh, God, please stop it.
The woman gave me, and I did eat.
- References Genesis 3:12, in which Eve and Adam ate the apple that got them sent to earth.
V-meat hot. V-meat cold. V-meat in the pot nine days old.
- References the Nursery Rhyme 'Pease Porridge Hot', but the pease porridge is replaced by V-meat.
We'd figure out what they wanted, and do it before they even had to ask. You felt safer that way. God. It feels awful to say it. But it's worse not to.
We're all hollow men, we are the stuffed men.
- References T.S. Elliot, The Hollow Men.
What happened to the gardens? We used to have gardens.
Where are the Americans? Where are the Russians?
Where do they bury them? I'll ask you that. You never see them burying them. Like it's some big secret.
Who's she talking to on all the telephones?
- References Mr. Kite and his followers who sometimes sends messages on the Telephones.

Women:[]

Extreme/Supreme executive power must derive from a mandate from the masses.
- References Monty Python and the Holy Grail.
I am the cat who walks by himself, and all places are alike to me.
- References Rudyard Kipling's Just So Stories, "The Cat That Walked By Himself."
I am in paris.
I just want them to stop screaming, that's all.
If the doors of perception were cleansed, we could see everything as it is: infinite.
- A quote from William Blake. The phrase "Cleanse the doors of your perception" is used in the game as means to take Histoplasma Mushrooms.
It's all falling apart, the center cannot hold.
- References William Butler Yeats, "The Second Coming."
(singing) London bridge has fallen down, fallen down, fallen down. London bridge has fallen down, my fair lady.
Maybe we couldn't have fought back. But why did we help them?
Mind the side effects! ooohh, but there's a big one we don't mention, isn't there?
- Recalls the side effects of taking Joy.
Mum. Dad. I've come 'ome. Oh don't you worry deary, everything will be alright from now on. You sit down and have a cuppa tea, I'll just go and make up your bed.
- The woman's interpretation of her daughter coming home from Germany.
Oedipus didn't know what he was doing. But he tore out his eyes anyway, didn't he?
- The Greek God that tore out his eyes after finding out he killed his father and married his mother.
Ours not to question why. Ours but to do and die.
- Quote from Alfred Lord Tennyson.
Strange how everyone looks the same. Like we're all just pawns on a chessboard.
The horror. The horror.
- References Joseph Conrad's "Heart of Darkness"
The mark of Cain was to protect him. People forget that.
- The 'mark of Cain' was God's promise to offer Cain divine protection from premature death.
The moving finger writes, and having writ, moves on, or all your piety nor wit, shall lure it back to cancel half a line.
- Quote from Omar Khayyám.
They could have taken them. But they didn't have to, did they? We brought them all to the station.
They have gossamer wings, just like in books. But the books don't tell you about their teeth, oh so frightfully sharp. And the way they stare at you, never blinking.
This is all just some game to you, isn't it? / This is some fucking game to you, isn't it?
- 4th wall break.
Thy will be done.
- One of the requests of Lord's prayer.
Toys and tiny beds. Tiny beds in every house.
We're all rotting, like the food.
What am I supposed to do with all the little shoes?
What if this is it. What if this is all there is?
What rough beast slouches towards the House of Bread?
- References The Second Coming, "And what rough beast, its hour come round at last, Slouches towards Bethlehem to be born?"
Why'd you take the Vanilla? You know it doesn't work for you. How could you forget that?
- Notes certain aspects in Joy, that taking the wrong flavour can render the user incapable of taking any more Joy.

Responses[]

Men:[]

At least you can drink from the pumps here.
Be kind to strangers. One day you'll be one of them.
Clothes make the man, don't they. Nobody likes a naked person.
Did you see an airplane? I could swear I saw an airplane.
Don't swim in the river. The fumes will kill you.
Getting enough sleep? It's important to sleep.
How do you stay so calm? How?
I better not catch you getting into my stuff.
I knew you once, didn't I?
If you find fresh food, don't try to hoard it. The Blight turns things rotten, sooner than you'd think.
It's nice to talk. It's good to talk.
It's strange. There's things here you could never find in Hamlyn Village.
I've seen an apple go rotten in my hand.
Never say you don't have a choice. Everybody has choices.
Never thought it would come to this, did we.
Roast beef. Beef Wellington. Wellington Pie. Shepherd's pie. Apple pie. Baked apple. Baked potato. Mashed potato. Bangers and mash. Mushy peas. Pie and mash. Fish pie. Fish and chips. Oh, very good, I'll have the fish and chips please. And a pint of the bitter thank you very much.
- Reading off of a menu, likely reminiscing the past when they had more food available.
Sometimes I like to sit down and read the paper, just like when I was back home. Amazing what you can pick up from it.
Sometimes, in the shadows, I think I see eyes.
Stay out of the fog. It bites.
Stay where I can see you. No one likes a lurker.
Strange how fast all the food's going off. You barely have time to eat it.
Surely some revelation is at hand. Maybe it's the Second Coming.
They can't have forgotten us, can they?
Well, well. There's more of us every day.
We've all got to stick together here. In spirit, anyway.
Who was Uncle Jack before he was Uncle Jack? I can't remember.
You never see the postman, do you? But the Royal Mail is on the job.
You'd be amazed what people throw into the bins.

Women:[]

Don't go opening up people's boxes just because they're not looking, right?
Don't wait to eat fresh things. They can go rotten while you're looking at the wind in the leaves.
How many holes would it take to fill the Albert Hal? I wish I knew.
- Likely referencing a verse from the Beatles' song A Day in the Life.
I saw a dead man. His lips were green. He'd been eating grass, d'you see? Because he was starving. We're not cows, we can't eat grass.
I saw a ghost in White Tree Park. But she wouldn't talk to me.
- Hint to Arthur's mother, Maeve.
I try not to talk about the... y'know. What we did to them. But sometimes I can't help it.
If you find fresh fruit or veg, don't wait too long. The Blight turns everything Rotten.
If you get a cut out here, you'd better bandage it up. You can get an infection just from a scratch.
I'm tired of fighting and running all the time.
It's best not to fight, if you can help it. Shove them away and run as fast as you can.
It's hard when you can't trust your own memory, innit?
It's too late to say you're sorry. How would he know? Why should he care?
- References the song "She's Not There" by The Zombies.
Pain doesn't make you brave. It doesn't make you anything.
- Judges the saying "Pain makes you stronger"
Sally Boyle could help me. But she doesn't do house calls out here, does she?
Sometimes I hear horsemen at night. It's the Four, isn't it.
- The Four Horsemen that symbolize evil, coming at the end of the world.
Sometimes you just have to eat rotten things. That's life, innit?
Stay away form the ones with plague. It's a terrible way to die.
The bobbies have a thirst on them, you know.
The road to hell is paved with good intentions.
- A proverb, the saying is an admonishment that a good intention is meaningless unless followed through. Likely originating from a 1670 book, A Collection of English Proverbs.
The worst of it is, we did things the Germans didn't even ask us to do.
Things fall apart. The center cannot hold. And everywhere the ceremony of innocence is drowned.
- Line from Yeat's Poetry The Second Coming.
This too shall pass. Perhaps.
Water everywhere, and not a drop to drink.
- References a line from “Rime of the Ancient Mariner” by Samuel Coleridge: “Water, water everywhere, nor any drop to drink.”, which is often misinterpreted as “Water, water everywhere, but not a drop to drink.”
Where does the fog come from? That's the answer to everything, I bet.
Will these hands never be clean?
You'll need something to believe in out here. It's the unbelievers who give up the fastest.
You should have stayed in the Village. There's food there.
Watch out for the ones with plague. They look sick, but then they suddenly become wild dogs.

After Curfew[]

Men:[]

Better get indoors!
It's stupid being out after dark!
Mind the bobbies! It's after dark! / Mind the hooligans! It's after dark!

Women:[]

After dark, love. Best stay out of sight!
Ain't it past your bedtime?
Go home and go to bed!

Hearing a Noise[]

Men:[]

Huh?
What?
What the fuck was that?
What the hell?
Who did that?

Women:[]

What was that?
Who's there?

Finding the Player[]

Men:[]

Not as invisible as you thought, are you?
I sniffed you out!
You're rubbish at hide and seek, aren't you?

Women:[]

Found you. Do I get a prize?
Look what the cat coughed up!
You're rubbish at hiding, y'know.

Searching for the Noise/Player[]

Men:[]

Don't think I won't sniff you out!
Huh?
Playing hard to get, are we?
What?
What the fuck was that?
What the hell?
Who did that?
You hear that?
You're here, I know you're here.

Women:[]

Don't worry, we'll find you and we'll fix you up!
This is a waste of both our time! Come out and take your medicine!
Want to play hide and seek? I love it.
Who are you hiding from, you bloody lurker!

Triggering a Trap/Giving Up[]

Men:[]

BANDIT! HELP!
BLUE MEANIES!
FIND HIM! HE'S KILLING US!
FIND THE KILLER!
LOOK OUT! ARM YOURSELVES!
No! Please! Stop!
No, please! I give up!
ROBBER! MURDERER! HELP!
Please don't hurt me!
Stop. I beg you!
WATCH OUT! THERE'S A KILLER LOOSE!
You don't want my blood on your hands!
You don't want to do this!

Women:[]

ARM YOURSELVES!
COME QUICKLY!
Dear God, save me!
HELP!
Help! Help! Please!
Please don't hurt me any more!
Please don't kill me!
Please, let me be!
SOMEBODY HELP ME! PLEASE!
Stop! I'm begging you!
THERE'S A BANDIT LOOSE, WATCH OUT!
THERE'S A MURDERER! HELP!

Beginning of Combat[]

Note, if the player is in combat and runs into other NPCs, they'll assume the player murdered somebody, even if the player committed a different crime.

Men:[]

Cry havoc! And slip the dogs of war!
- Quote from Shakespeare's Julius Caesar.
He's got blood on his hands!
There! That's the one who's done it!
There they are! Get them! / There they are, get'em!
There's the one that done it!
Will no one rid me of this turbulent priest?
- A quote attributed to Henry II of England preceding the death of Thomas Becket, the Archbishop of Canterbury.
You can't have our biscuits!
You can't kill all of us!
You're not a ghost!

Women:[]

It's him! He's the killer!
There's the one who did it! There! / There they are, get'em!
You leave them alone!
You're not from around here!

Taunts During Combat[]

Men:[]

Don't eat V-meat! Don't eat it!
Down you go!
Good night! / Say good night!
Fire!
Fuck off Home!
I wouldn't be here except for you!
It's time!
Leave my friend alone!
Mark of the Beast!
No church bells for you.
Remember the fifth of November!
- Guy Fawkes Night, celebrated in Great Britain and New Zealand.
Plywood and paper mâché! Plywood and paper mâché!
- References the fake tanks in the Victory Memorial Camp.
Sleep! Dream!
Stop making our food rot!
Supper's over!
They're not coming back! They're never coming back!
We've come to the end of our time! We've come to the end of our time!
- Uncle Jack's sign off at the end of all his shows.
What's truth? Is mine the same as yours?
Who will guard the guardians? Hah? Who will guard them?
Wolf! Wolf!
You can't just call it a Victory! A Victory is when you win!
You're V-meat! / You're v-meat! You're all V-meat!
- Likely referencing Reg Cutty's vicious practices.

Women:[]

A rat!
Bandit!
It's in the water! It's in the pipes!
It's not fair! Why did they get to go, and not me?
Make them stop! Make them stop!
Robber!
Rotten Apple!
Scrounge this!
They're gone, but they won't go away! How come they won't go away!
Thief!
Tourist!
We knew! At some level, we all knew!
We've come to the end of our time! We've come to the end of our time!
- Uncle Jack's sign off at the end of all his shows.
Wrecker!
You can't eat gardenians! You can't eat petunias!

Losing Interest[]

Men:[]

Fine! Run away and hide!
What a waste of time!

Women:[]

Bloody waste of time!
Go on then. Hide your life away.
Good riddance to bad rubbish.
Glad that's out of my head!
I guess we'll never know what that was.

Throwing Rocks/Bricks[]

Men:[]

And the pitch!
Here! Catch!
Here you are! Catch!
Take this!

Women:[]

Catch! I didn't say Simon Says!
- Simon Says is the game that the Wellies play the most.
Have some Irish confetti!
On your head!
This one's on you!

Seeing The Player Act Suspiciously[]

Carrying Corpses[]

Men:[]

Hey! That ain't your friend!
Leave that body alone!
Let the dead rest, mate.

Women:[]

Get that out of here before the stink sets in!
That's not your friend! Put'em down!
What are you doing carrying that corpse around?

Lockpicking[]

Men:[]

Hey! That's not your house!

Women:[]

You get away from there, or I'm calling the police!

Shoving[]

Men:[]

Oh, was I in your way?!
You blind?

Women:[]

Shove off!
Watch where you're fucking going!
You stepped on my goddamn foot!

Sprinting (near bridges)[]

Men:

Keep that up and I'll clock you!
Stop that! You're making me dizzy!
You're pissing me off on purpose, aren't you?

Women:

Are you trying to bring the Bobbies down on us?

Staring[]

Men:[]

Fuck off! If you fancy me, gimme some V-meat! (Front)
It's rude to stare! (Front)
Keep that up and I'll clock you! (Behind)
Stop that! You're making me dizzy! (Behind)
Take a picture, it'll last longer! (Front)
You're pissing me off on purpose, aren't you? (Behind)

Women:[]

Are you trying to bring the Bobbies down on us? (Behind)
Can't you just try to fucking blend in?! (Behind)
Keep your eyes to yourself, you knob! (Front)
Put your eyes back in your head, thank you! (Front)
What the hell is wrong with you? (Behind)
You want to be rude? I'll show you rude! (Front)

Stealing[]

Men:[]

Get your paws off my things!
It's not your bloody birthday, is it?
Oi! That's not yours, is it?

Women:[]

Bloody thieving bastard!
Do you mind???
Robber! Murderer! Help!
Tom! George! Harry! He's stealing our things!
You can't have it! It's precious to me!
You did it, didn't you?

Trespassing[]

Men:[]

A man's home is his castle, and it's not your bleeding castle!
Find somewhere else to kip!
Hey! You don't live here!
We're not the bloody bread and breakfast, are we? So get out!
You can't have our water! (special to Water Pumps)
You're not my neighbour!
You're not the bloody help, are you! So get out!

Women:[]

Find your own campsite!
I don't recall inviting you!
I'm calling the authorities!
I'm not cooking for you!
There's no room for you here!
This isn't your house!
You don't belong here, get out!

Weapon[]

Men:[]

Hold on! No need to get personal.
I see we're past the point of talking.
Put that away, or I'll call the bobbies!
Put that away! You wanna get us both arrested?
Spoiling for a fight, are we?
Well that's hard to argue with.
You won't intimidate me with that!

Women:[]

He's armed.
Look out! He's got a weapon!
Pull a weapon on me, you'll get one right back!
Put that down, you maniac!
Put that thing down!
Put that weapon away! Now!
This is a decent neighbourhood!

Not Wearing the Right Clothes, or Any[]

Men:[]

Are you a tourist? You're dressed like one. (Proper Suit)
I used to wear clothes like that. (Proper Suit)
Oooh, look who's dressed up for a garden party! (Proper Suit)
Who do you think you are, dressed like that? (Rubber Cat Suit)
Put some clothes on, you maniac! (Naked)

Women:[]

Don't you look all superior, in your fancy clothes and all. (Proper Suit)
Dressed up for church, are we? (Proper Suit)
I bet those clothes keep you so nice and warm. (Proper Suit)
I remember when I had nice clothes to wear. (Proper Suit)
Put some clothes on for God's sake! (Naked)
Slumming it, are we? Must be nice to have a closet. (Proper Suit)
That's no way to dress! Stop it! (Rubber Cat Suit)

Correcting Mistake[]

Men:[]

That's better. Thought you were some kind of tourist.
That's it. Just try to make it through the day.
Thank God. Don't want to call the Bobbies down on our heads.

Women:[]

That's better. One less headache.
That's a relief. You're trouble, you know that.
That's one less problem I've got.

Wastrel Encourages a Fight[]

Men:[]

Don't stop on my account!
Finally, a little action 'round here.
That's what I like to see!

Women:[]

Put'em to the ground!

Seeing a Corpse[]

Men:[]

Dammit. Dammit. Dammit.
Guess there's nothing we can do for him now.
I don't even know who this is.
I wish I had pennies for your eyes.
Oh, God. Not another.
So many, I had not thought there would be so many.
Well, you're not my problem, I guess.
Who's gonna clean that up?

Women:[]

Ah ... shit.
Come on. Wake up. Please.
Did I know you?
I guess it's none of my business, really.
More for the rest of us, I suppose.
Nothing more we can do for'em.
Nothing much to fuss about, I guess.
Who done you in? Not that it matters, I guess.
Whoever it was, I hope he doesn't come for me.
You survived all this and now you're done for.
You've got no more worries, have you?

Drug State[]

Men:[]

Oh, lucky you, Joy works for you.

Women:[]

It's all so colourful, isn't it?

Notes of Distraction[]

Men:[]

Start[]

Here be tygers.
It's enough to drive you mad, it is.
I've never seen anything like it... have I?
Now I know I'm losing my mind.
There are more things in heaven and Earth, Horation, than are dreamt of in your philosopy.
Well, now I can die happy.
What the hell was that about?

End[]

I wish I'd stayed right here.
That did not make sense.
That was awfully peculiar.
What the hell was that about?

Women:[]

Start[]

Cancel half a line...
I wouldn't get too close to it.
That looks like fun, is it a trap?
That's damn peculiar.
That's not dangerous, is it?
What's it doing?

End[]

Did I dream that? Are we still dreaming?
I still feel quesy.
Is that what I thought it was?
It's enough to drive you mad, and I'm half mad already.
It's enough to make you dizzy, isn't it?
That was awfully peculiar.
What the hell was that about?

Hallucinogen[]

Men:[]

There can't be dogs! We ate all the dogs!
What's that smell? What's that smell?
You keep that bloody dog away from me!

Women:[]

We're all dog food! We're not even people food!
What big teeth you have, my god what sharp teeth you have!
You can't see them. But you can hear them, can't you? Snuffling in the shadows.

Quest Quotes[]

Point of Departure[]

We should have brought another bomb.
We don't have another bomb, do we.
There has to be a way in. He gets in.

Golden Oldies[]

Women:

Someone's been sleeping in my bed!
And they're still here!

Hallucinogenic Salad[]

Men:[]

Daisy, Daisy, give me your answer do. I'm half crazy, all for the love of you. It won't be a stylish marriage, for I can't afford a carry. But you'll look sweet, upon the seat of a bicycle built for two.
It's all so dreary! It's all so bleak? Why does it have to be so bleak?
THE WOLF! THE WOLF HAS COME!
WHERE'D SHE GO? WHERE'D SHE GO?
WOLF! WOLF! WATCH OUT!

Women:[]

DAISY! COME BACK! DAISY! WHERE ARE YOU?
I can't see her! I can't see her! ... I need more mushrooms.
I just don't feel ... special any more. I need more mushrooms.
KILL THE WOLF! KILL THE WOOOOOOLF!
SHE'S NOT A REAL DOG! SHE'S NOT A REAL FUCKING DOG! WE ATE ALL OUR DOGS!
You can't have our dog! You can't eat our dog!
YOU CAN'T HAVE OUR MUSHROOMS!

Haute Cuisine[]

Current[]

DID WE SAY COOK US A PLATE OF SHIT TASTING FOOD? NO, WE TOLD YOU FUCKING MEAT AND POTATOES TASTING FOOD, YOU STUPID BINT!
I can't take it any more. I can't take it. Oh, God. Meat and potatoes! (Nigel)

Previous[]

GET COOKING OR BACK IN THE HOLE YOU GO.
I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU MAKE IT OUT OF, BUT IT BETTER TASTE LIKE MEAT AND POTATOES WHEN WE GET BACK!
DID WE SAY COOK US A PLATE OF SHIT TASTING FOOD? NO, WE TOLD YOU FUCKING MEAT AND POTATOES TASTING FOOD, YOU STUPID BINT!
THIS IS PRIVATE PROPERTY. YOU BEST CLEAR OFF, WHOEVER YOU ARE. IF WE FIND YOU, YOU'RE NOT GONNA LIKE IT.

Motilene Makes You Strong[]

Current[]

Come on! Spit it out!
AND you drank our bloody Motilene! We needed that!
Throw it up or you're gonna die!

Previous[]

This is between us and Ralph. Nothing to do with you!

Mystery House[]

Come ye guardians of the watchtower of the sky. Ye who walks the battlemen to keep the shapeless at bay. Hail ye guardians of the worlds, we call to you and beseit you. Be here now.
Come ye guardians of the watchtower of the depths. Ye who hoard the mysteries, and the words that may not be spoken aloud. Hail ye guardians of the worlds. We call to you and beseit you. Be here with us now.
Are the guardians here? Let him come to us within the secret triangle, let him come to us who was dead but now who rises. Open your heart, let him enter. Open your loins, let him enter. Open your third eye, let him enter. Is the doorway open?