The Church of Simon Says is an old cathedral where Wellies have Simon Says tournaments each week. The entrance is guarded by a Downer Detector, only when taking Joy or Sunshine will the player be able to pass through undetected. Behind the church is a small graveyard fenced off from the public.
It is also the name of a side quest in Act One.
- Go to Church
- Bring Nick Lightbearer to the Church
- Let the games begin!
- Escape the Church
- Deactivate the electricity
- Take the medal
Arthur Hastings notices the first prize at Simon Says is a medal. He decides to enter and steal it from the winner. Mrs Gladstone tells Arthur that they're waiting on Nick Lightbearer to show up as he will be the one judging the contest. After going out and dressing up as Nick, he impersonates him to get in. Using the Simon Says machine control panel to outsmart players. Until the machine short circuits and electrocutes everyone. Arthur shuts off the power before taking the medal and leaving.
- The church's real name is the Church of St. Genesius.
- Mrs Gladstone mentions that most of the church was rebuilt after the bombings in World War II.
- Other prizes to collect include Saltpeter, a pile of Coins and a Flour Bag.
- The Note, Tea and Biscuits can be found on the table.
- The note, Sermon Idea, is next to Mrs Gladstone's body.
- The participants are wearing rubber cat suits, implying that they are from the reform club.