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"FOGGY JACK" IS A REAL KILLER

How often, as curfew hour approaches, do we Wellies joke: "Go inside or Foggy Jack will get you!" The "O" Courant believes our legendary boogey-man is actually a real person -- and a real murderer. A number of citizens have recently gone missing after walking in the fog at night.

In the past year, Annie Chapman, Elizabeth Stride, and Catherine Eddowes were all found to have "gone on holiday" after venturing out after curfew in thick fog. Their "holiday" announcements all claimed they had been "carelessly running with scissors" at the time of their deaths. In fact their bodies were hacked to bits, the "O" Courant can now report. In addition, the "Missing Marys" -- Mary Jane Kelly and Mary Anne Nichols -- whose return from Gibraltar we have been told to expect, were also last seen on the evening of a pea-souper. They too were found to have been hacked to pieces.

It is unclear whether the constabulary is actually investigating Foggy Jack, as they literally laughed at this reporter when asked about him. But (continued on page 4)

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