It's a clipping from Saturday's newspaper:
"The Hamlyn Village weekly Simon Says game offered more than the usual excitement last Friday. The game was reaching its usual fever pitch, with contestants dropping out right and left, then suddenly alert villagers noted a small squad of Wastrels sneaking up from the direction of the bridge to the Garden District. They were presumably taking advantage of the absence of villagers from their homes and shops in order to steal into town and, well, steal.
"As everyone knows, there is plenty of Wastrels in the Garden District -- it is, after all, the Garden District -- but they seem to like our food better.
"The hue and cry went up, and the entire village chased after these "Joy-less" malcontents, who escaped into the river and were never seen again. So, although no prize could be awarded, since no one could remember who was still in the game, everyone was a winner!
"The break-in seems to have resulted from a temporary failure from a diagnostic kiosk on the bridge. The kiosk has been fixed, so future games of Simon Says can go ahead undisturbed."