June 12, 1950

TO: Harry Haworth
FROM: General Byng

Dear sir,

As you know, our citizens have become dispirited due to some unfortunate incidents during the War. I believe your laboratory could be of service in restoring morale.

On examining the German camp, we discovered that German soldiers were given "fatigue pills" that contained amphetamines and opioids, which contributed greatly to their esprit de corps. It turns out that's how their men were able to punch through our lines again and again -- we were wondering how it was they never seemed to sleep.

I believe the answer to our problems may be chemical. I believe you might be the hero we need now.

I am aware that this will inconvenience your own research, but as that other great Napoleon-fighter said, "England expects that every man will do his duty."


  • "Esprit de corps" is a French phrase that translates to "The Morale of a Group"
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